France - USA : trompeuse ressemblance: French Shool

I first intended to write about our (bad) experiences with French Civil Services since we settled back in France (ah, French Civil Services ...) but this post will wait. In fact, I prefer to start with something positive, a really positive experience since we came back: school.

Actually I have a long experience of French schools: my eldest son is currently in 4^th grade so I’ve "experienced" French school since September 2008 (when my son began pre-pre-K at 3). However having been expatriate helps me look at things with a fresh look.

Currently I have three children attending neighborhood public schools: one is in 4^th grade, the second in 1^st grade and the 3rd in pre-pre-K (as in France school begins at 3, at a sort of “pre-pre-K”). And I’d like to talk about my 1^st grade son’s experience.

Indeed, my son went to school in the United States during the second half of Kindergarten and the first part of 1st grade (we lived in the US from January 2014 to January 2015). And among my children he was the one for whom school was trickier. The reason is that in France students start to read and write in 1^st grade whereas in the US (at least in his school in Baltimore, Md) they start in Kindergarten. Moreover there are many differences about learning methods between France and the United States: many unspoken letters (in French) against almost all the letters pronounced (in English) and its corollary, syllabic reading and memorization of key syllables (in France) against phonetics (in the United States), cursive writing (in France) against script writing (in the US), and in a connected way, a focus on literature and poetry (in France) against a greater effort placed on math (in the US, compared with France) in Kindergarten and 1^st grade.

When we returned in France in January, my son wasn’t able to read French. In fact my husband and I had decided that he had enough to do in English and didn’t want him to be overloaded with additional French courses at home during our stay in the US. And very quickly he got quite destabilized: he knew that he was well behind the average of his class French literature skills. And I confess that I too was a little discouraged: how to quickly and efficiently help him bridge the gap?

But he was lucky enough to have an extraordinary teacher, who despite having more than 30 students in her class was able to devote the necessary time and give the encouragement he needed. Firstly she registered him for RASED support courses (personalized support courses for students who need it). I vaguely knew this support network was for students who struggle and I wasn’t very reassured to learn that he participated in those courses (one hour a day, every school day, inside school building). But I have done what we were supposed to do: trust the school. I’ve learned that Americans interfere more than we do in school stuffs, demanding for more "accounts" to teachers, interacting more with the school and teachers ... but I also know from my experience that in general here in France, school staff members don’t appreciate a lot “over-demanding” parents and take it as a mark of lack of confidence... So my husband and I supported things the best we could and as we were supposed to: without asking for tons of detailed feedbacks (I met only once formally the professor in early February and had some more informal exchanges in front of the school gate ...) and we also helped him with his homework every evening.

And the result was tremendous: RASED courses were stopped before February holidays (and lasted only 8 weeks) and my son is now able to read and write very well. Of course the fact that he perfectly speaks French helped him to fill the gap thanks to seeking the meaning of sentences. And according to his 2 professors (regular one and RASED one) he has very good skills and abilities ... Nevertheless I’m grateful for the speed and efficiency of the whole process. And above all, my son’s self-confidence didn’t suffer throughout this catch-up period. I think that both professors were demanding but very encouraging.

Obviously from an American point of view, despite two meetings (one in February with the main teacher and one final meeting once the process was stopped with the other teacher on early March), we had very little feedback on what was actually going on on a daily or even weekly basis. This could be experienced by an American as a lack of communication between school and family. But I know as a French mom that teachers wouldn’t have appreciated an "intrusion" from day to day.